The first post.

After some "strong encouragement" to set up a blog, here it is. This isn't going to be fancy as it doesn't need to be, but I will say a few things along with the disclaimer.

I intend to post what's going through my mind on this page. It will not be "Politically Correct." It will not be sensitive to social norms, or written to convey a facade about me. It will just be my happiness, my frustration, my joy and my sadness.

I've discovered recently that who I am, and who I want to be, should not be two different things. In my desire to become who I want to be, I've had to cross a number of old bridges. Some of which were burned by me, some of which were burned by the people standing on the other end. Some were never burned by anyone, others were reinforced as I crossed them. These are the bridges I aim to keep.

On this page, you'll likely find posts about beer, my car, political issues and more.


The song of the week is a song called "Life is Beautiful" which I found thanks to Janell. She seems to be full of fantastic music.

"When you lose it all... That's when you finally realize that life is beautiful."
The song was written and sang by Nikki Sixx, front man for Motley Crue and now Sixx:A.M. The song is from the album that goes along with his new book titled "The Heroin Diaries."

My association with this is having "lost it all" to some degree, before I found myself, my job, my happiness. I was going no where doing nothing but playing video games and wondering why the world had it out for me. Every last of the few dollars I earned were torn from me through rent, bills, transportation and I felt destroyed, like the world was trying to keep me from my happiness. I thought that the world acted like I owed it something, because the world wouldn't let me just do nothing in an apartment and play videogames without paying anyone or working for it.

What I realized, in part came with my job, and in part came before I even applied when I realized exactly where I was going and what I was doing. I was an "addict" though not to any chemical, but to my emotions, and the way I let the world make me feel. I was too irresponsible to take control of my own life, and I wasn't upset enough to change my situation - I just presumed it was out of my hands. What changed my life, was my attitude - I was tired of being a victim.

Addictions can happen with anything - Emotions, Hobbies, Drugs, Food, Work... the most difficult challenge is whether or not you can recognize it. Whether you do something about it or not is easy once you realize there's a problem.

The second point here is...
There's two ways to be a victim.
1. If you sanction and accept whatever has happened to you, as though you have no control. If you presume you had no control, then you've given any opportunity to do so, over to someone else.
2. If someone points a gun to your head (real, or in effect) and threatens your life or your property.